The Win-Win Strategy

When your wife comes out of a room with another man, and you raise your eyebrows, and she later gives you a ferocious curtain-lecture about the evils of irrational jealous possessiveness, this means one of two things. Either you have been unjustly jealous and irrationally possessive, or she has just been fucking the other man’s brains out. The problem is that there is no telling which.

If you have been unjustly jealous and irrationally possessive, then berating you for being unjustly jealous and irrationally possessive is not only justified but a rational strategy on her part. If, on the other hand, she was fucking the guy’s brains out, then berating you for being unjustly jealous and irrationally possessive is an equally rational strategy on her part. If you were wrong, then the reproaches may change your behaviour for the better (for her); but if you were right, then the reproaches may cause you to refrain from entirely functional behaviour, namely further suspicion, investigation and divorce. Either way, she wins.

When Joe Schmoe is in his twenties, he is insecure and afraid that his new bride may be having an affair with the guy down the street. In his thirties, Joe goes into therapy for his irrational jealousy and patriarchal possessiveness. In his forties, Joe is a model New Man, reposing implicit trust in his wife and not projecting onto her his own male “inability to commit”. In his fifties, he discovers that she has been having an affair with the guy down the street for thirty years.

Posted on December 4, 2012 at 11:32 by Hugo Grinebiter · Permalink
In: WHAT WOMEN WANT, The Cult Of St. Joseph

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