The Methodology Of “Faux-Nice Guys”

Nowhere is Nietzsche”s dictum on virtue, namely that it is something that somebody else profits from your having, more relevant than when women praise a man for being “nice”. Wise men know that being called “nice” is the kiss of death – it means being pigeonholed as someone will give women whatever they want without recompense – and contend that “nice guys finish last”.

Now, some women have responded by creating whole websites devoted to refuting this thesis. This they achieve mainly by redefining “nice” as “creepy whiners with a sense of entitlement”. The sort of men whom these sites describe no doubt exist, but their annoyingness is of no interest here; this is a case of abusus non tollit usum. That is, the fact that some in reality not–so-very-nice-after-all men claim that their niceness is what keeps them celibate is by no means a formal disproof of the thesis that nice guys finish last. These faux-nice guys may indeed be finishing last, as they no doubt deserve, but the real question is what happens to the genuine nice guys. The women behind these sites claim to treat “genuine nice guys” quite differently, of course, but then they would, wouldn’t they? Evidence, please.

Given that the whole business of men claiming to be ‘nice’ and complaining that women do not reward them for it is a simple and direct response to the propaganda that suggests that women are waiting for a nice guy, we may also rule Plaintiffs to be guilty of gross hypocrisy. For they have wilfully advertised themselves as responsive to nice guys and then complained when men, whether truly nice or otherwise, rationally tailored their own strategy in response to that advertising.

If only women were more honest about to the extent to which they were turned on (or off) by genuine niceness, then the whole problem of these passive-aggressive faux-nice guys would not even exist. But then, if women did that, they would not be able to extract so much value from men through the millennia-old strategy of implied promises to reward niceness.

In reality the term “nice” is a universal code, meaning that the man demands nothing in return for what he gives; that is, he is exploitable without having to be fucked. The creepy whiners so reprobated by the anti-nice-guy websites are demanding fulfilment of the contract only because they are too literal-minded or too stupid to realise that the contract was never intended seriously in the first place. Abusing them for not really being nice at all is therefore a female strategy for preventing these men from realising their mistake, and thus also a strategy for making them continue to make profitable (to the women) attempts to fulfil their side of the bargain. Such men are being encouraged to make greater efforts to be nice, or to stop being faux-nice and become truly nice. This is called “keeping the sucker in the game”.

On the other hand, this whole discussion of annoyingly needy and whiny men claiming to be “nice” and thereby deserving of female favour is somewhat of a red herring, because when men judge that “nice guys finish last”, what they are actually affirming is rather the corollary, namely that “nasty guys finish first”. There are no corresponding websites to explain how nasty men are really nice at heart, this being the preserve of trashy romantic novels and movies.

Posted on September 4, 2012 at 12:27 by Hugo Grinebiter · Permalink
In: WHAT WOMEN WANT, All The Nice Girls Love An Arsehole

Leave a Reply