Although the doctrine is formally stated as “anti-Semitism has no cause”, this is not to be taken literally. What is actually meant is that anti-Semitism has no Jewish cause. It must have some aetiology, and the obvious, but merely implied, cause is inborn Gentile depravity. It thus becomes a classic study in cognitive attribution theory, which describes how actors explain their own actions in terms of the constraints of the situation in which they find themselves but the actions of the enemy in terms of his innate evil disposition. Just as it is the nature of fish to swim and birds to fly, therefore, the metaphysics states that it is in the nature of Gentiles to hate Jews; and that this hatred is never caused or provoked by anything Jews have done, will do or even could do, but simply is, like the cosmic background radiation.

For the seamless-garment metaphysic to work, hatred of Jews must be truly universal, with no individual Gentile exempt. It is always possible that the Gentile who at first sight appears not to be an anti-Semite will, one fine day, see fit to object to something a Jew or Jews do or say.

One must therefore be in a state of continuous expectation that the particular Gentile will exhibit the anti-Semitism that one simply knows he nurtures in his breast; and if one becomes impatient to experience the fulfilment of said expectations, why, one can always do something to annoy him.

For example, if he is inconveniently disagreeing with something you are saying on the basis of one human being to another, you can launch the rhetorical question, “You’re only saying that because I’m Jewish, aren’t you?” He will either deny it, which you can take to be a confirmation (with the aid of vulgarisation of the Freudian notion of “resistance”), or get annoyed, with the same result. In any other context, of course, this perception of the Gentile as the irredeemable carrier of an invisible spiritual infection would count as a stereotype or even as hate-speech. This, however, is the cat that nobody has ever dared to bell; not even when Simon Wiesenthal, in an echo of the Nazis’ own terminology, accused Norwegian academics critical of Israel of being infected by the “virus” of anti-Semitism.

Were an individual Gentile to be deemed to be honourably exempt from the causeless disease of anti-Semitism, on the other hand, then it might be necessary actually to listen to what he had to say. And this, of course, tells us precisely why the dogma of the cosmically all-pervading and mysteriously causeless anti-Semitism is so firmly believed. Cui bono? What a marvellous belief it is, that can magically connect all criticism of, opposition to and annoyance at your individual actions, or the actions of your local community, or the actions of the state of your choice, with an event of such totemic horror that all such criticism, opposition and annoyance must be immediately abandoned! What possible reason will there ever be for laying down such a potent weapon?

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