Why The British Have Such Knobbly Knees

Modern schoolchildren appear to be taught to warm up before sports, and to stretch out afterwards. This may be because they and/or their parents often now go to private fitness clubs, whose managers and instructors have no financial interest in people damaging themselves. I do not recall much of this from my school, which enforced a great variety of compulsory games, sports and gymnastics. Warm-up by running round the pitch before playing soccer or rugby in short trousers in sub-zero weather, perhaps occasionally; stretching afterwards, never. The motto of the gym master appeared to be, “What does not kill them makes me stronger.”

Posted on February 5, 2011 at 11:16 by Hugo Grinebiter · Permalink
In: PARENTAL STATUS TECHNOLOGY, Hugo Grinebiter's Schooldays

2 Responses

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  1. Written by urban
    on February 5, 2011 at 15:28
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    Were the gym masters not child-hating, sociopathic sadists, (speaking solely from my own experience), this would benefit them not at all. Sadly, that sort of thing is common. And not just in England.

    Nice twist on the old saw, btw.

    Yes, it’s true that broken bones heal stronger at the break point than they were before, so let’s just use brickbats to smash the bones of all of our children. We’ll end up with a super race, right? We can start by toughening up those skulls. Sure they’ll be in a lot of pain, and many will die, but those that survive will never need to wear a helmet. Just think of how much the military and construction industries will save on millinery alone!

    Poor Nietzsche! Another citation wrenched from context and applied where it just doesn’t fit. Were it true that whatever doesn’t kill one only makes one stronger universally, in all situations and all cases, then how does one explain all the professional athletes who are invalids by their 40s and 50s? Sure, they were injured many times, but they had the best medical care too. Shouldn’t they be invincible superheroes by now?

    And what is one to make of all the disabled veterans, many of whom never fully recover? It must be some fault of character that they failed to take advantage of a wonderful opportunity to grow and become stronger.

    So don’t be fooled next time you see one of those manipulative ads featuring pictures of starving children. Malnutrition is the best thing that could possibly happen to such kids. Those that survive will be extraordinary specimens, super humans. If we’re not careful the Third World will pass us on the inside lane. We must immediately stop feeding our children so well! Ketchup, bread, and water, Once a day. Twice on holidays. Hungry? Here’s a sugar packet.

    It’s a good thing I’m not king!

  2. Written by James Beck
    on February 7, 2011 at 06:27
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    Stretching goes in an out of vogue. At the moment it is out for the most part. Some trainers still use it. Most don’t. That’s not to say that the trainers that don’t recommend stretching before exercise, don’t recommend it at all. It’s just that it takes about twenty minutes per spot to get much benefit. These days, ‘warm-up’ is usually accomplished by doing whatever sport you’re playing.

    Under the current version of received wisdom, a more likely cause of knobbly British knees is the long period of British wealth, and a desire for the world to be well-ordered that takes the form of smooth, even sidewalks and pavement, and rarely going barefooted. Both mean less development for the supporting muscles, ligaments, and tendons.

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