Archive for the ‘I Want Love, You Just Want Sex’ Category

A New Market Structure

Around 1990 a woman friend reported to me that among her contemporaries, later called Generation X, all the boys wanted commitment and all the girls wanted to continue playing the field. The new paradigm has since made its way, rather fitfully, into mass media entertainment. We need not be surprised; for the original paradigm only […]

Enjoyment And Bad Faith

A modern girl is able and likely to tell a man to his face whether she likes him or fancies him, or both or neither. She is allowed to say, “Just sex, right?” In my youth, however, mainstream women never, ever admitted explicitly that they did anything whatsoever with a view to obtaining sexual pleasure. […]

Fall “In Love”, Pass Go, Collect 200 Dollars

When asked why she is sleeping with a particular man, the middle-class Western woman traditionally replies, “He says he loves me”. Women from cultures that are more realistic about human sexuality, namely most of them, are more likely to reply, “He be good to me”. The latter response is about the dynamics of the relationship […]

The Transcendence Of One’s Own Thing

If women are faced with a situation of external sanction and its internalisation as delusion, whereby they may have whatever sex they like provided solely that they are “in love”, then their rational course of action is clearly to ensure that they are “in love” whenever they wish to have sex. By dint of assiduous […]

Two Explanations Of The Seducer

One of the secrets of the big-cat seducer is that he succeeds for two equal and opposite reasons simultaneously. Innocent girls lie down for him because they don’t know what he is, and so expect love and commitment, while experienced women lie down for him because they do know what he is, and so expect […]

Oh, Do Shut Up, Tiresias

Perhaps the most resonant figure in all of Greek mythology is Tiresias, the blind prophet with insight into both male and female mysteries. Punished by Hera by being turned into a woman for seven years, in some versions he married and bore a daughter, in other versions worked in a brothel in Corinth. Being then […]

“There Are No Decent Men”

In a 1966 dating study, the women expressed very much more pronounced preferences than the men regarding every single quality in their dates other than physical attractiveness. In those days, as described above, women could not be honest about their attraction to looks, but were obliged to bullshit about inner and spiritual qualities. One possible […]

The Two Great Pretences

Everyone knows that men sometimes pretend to be “in love” in order to get their legs over, and that this often leads to female heartbreak. It is considered normal and praiseworthy to challenge them on this strategising, to put them to the proof and even to disbelieve them purely on general principles. But wait a […]

He Done Me Wrong

Because Love has always been considered a mitigating factor, a woman’s best defence against a charge of promiscuity is to “fall in love” with every man she sleeps with. This is forward-looking positioning as the victim, getting it accepted that she is only going to bed with the man because of the Power of Her […]

You Just Want – What?

Nobody believes a man when he claims to Love; oh, everyone says, he just wants sex. Which in our culture is a crushing dismissal. Just wanting sex is considered a bad thing, and for that very reason is rarely attributed to women. For nobody ever says, oh, she just wants sex. Only she herself can […]